Whether its shopping for a new outfit, driving your kids to soccer, cooking the family dinner or folding laundry, how we do anything, is how we do everything, include how we choose to eat.
Even if you've developed some bad habits over the years relating to food, rest assured, these habits can be changed. Its important not to label yourself an "impulsive stress eater", even if at times you do numb yourself with food and drink, because the labels we attach to ourselves can de detrimental to our personal progress and positive change. Remember, you get to choose whether you eat with mindfulness, intention, attention and pleasure. No one can do it for you, just like no one can rob you of your ability to eat this way. When you put your powerful hat on (as opposed to your victim hat) , you realize that you can choose to eat, from this day forward, in a way that honors and respects your body. You can choose to remain in the comfort zone and not overdo things. Have you ever secretly observed your naturally thin friend eating? I can almost guarantee that they take their time with food, they are selective (aka fussy) with their food choices, not afraid to leave food on their plate, especially if they've had enough already and, whether they realise it or not, naturally thin eaters stay connected to their hunger and fullness cues as they eat. It may be unconscious for them, because, for whatever reason, they never lost touch with their inherent connection to their body cues. Ironically, when we aim for more pleasure with food, we naturally eat less of it. We become satisfied sooner and quite discerning and we start noticing the quality of our food choices. When we are acutely aware of quality, its way easier to say no in the face of a mediocre piece of cake. I mean, if we're going to indulge ourselves in cake, it had better be the best possible cake we can find, right? after all, we need to make sure its really worth it, because we are pleasure seekers when it comes to food. This is where the French ladie helped me a lot! But let"say we order/buy/make some food and it just doesn't quite live up to our expectations? Do we eat it anyway? Hell no! There is no point. If you can't get maximum pleasure out of every bite, you are best to put the fork down. Yes, it may be dissapointing. You might have put effort into buyin or making the food. Alas, if it"s any consolation, you were better off without it, especially if it didn't absolutely rock your socks! As a side note, leaving food that you have paid good money for requires an abundant mindset, as opposed to a scarcity mindset. We will work on how to adopt an abundant attitude around food a bit later, but for now, just be mindful of what's going through your head when this situation arises. In summary, if you are a patient, deliberate, pleasure seeker who aims to treat her body like its the holy grail that it is, then how you eat will reflect this. So the next time you sit down to a meal, take a moment to pause and reflect of how you want to approach eating, and life, because how we choose to eat and behave around food really does flow over into every aspect of our lives.
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One of the biggest challenges we experience when faced with the urge to eat, even though we know we are not physically hungry, is how to stop our urges. Because, after all, sometimes they feel stronger than our ability to manage them.
There are lots of tactics out there, including ways to distract yourself as soon as you feel the urge to eat coming on, such as have a cup of tea, go for a walk, soak in a bubble bath, listen to music or read a book. Sometimes activities like this do the trick, other times they don't. So what if these delay tactics don't work? What can we do? Approaching eating from a place of mindfulness, again, in my experience, is the answer. The technique I recommend is called "urge surfing". Once you get the hang of it, you'll probably never be at the mercy of a tub of ice-cream again. there's one caveat though, it takes a lot of practice. It wont happen overnight, but it will happen. Its a skill worth mastering. Surfing the urge is a mindfulness technique, based on the premise that urges come in waves, and they are transient in nature. This means we can learn to "ride out" the urge to eat in the moments when we: a) aren't physically hungry b) feel powerless over the addictive qualities of the desired food Instead of trying to fight the urge and give in to it, we instead learn to accept and watch it rise and dissipate, simply by practising awareness around it. It's important to remind yourself that urges never last forever, and usually there is an underlying emotional trigger, such as feeling overwhelmed, anxious, stressed or frustrated about something. Stay tuned in to these thoughts, reflect on what events led to them, because these are possibly your personal triggers and when you experience these emotional states, they are your warning sign that some damage is about to be done. Just be ready to accept these feelings. You can even talk to yourself in order to clearly identify and then articulate what they are. It might be something like, "Gee, my boss was super moody today, he snapped at me for no apparent reason and it made me feel angry that he uses me as his verbal punching bag" Then you can say to yourself, "I guess he has some pressurres on him at the moment and I am not going to let his words drive me to eat junk food my body doesnt need". Take a seat and focus on your breath, and without judging yourself, notice that you simply have a desire to comfort yourself with food. Don't judge yourself, simply observe. By recognising head hunger, you can then choose to either eat a little something if you really want to or choose to meet your underlying need to "let of steam" in a way that doesn't involve food. Whatever you do, just know that you have choices in that moment. If you have a fight with a donut, you can win. You are powerful, not powerless. And if you don't eat, nothing bad will happen. In fact, not eating in that moment will prove to yourself just how free you really are. By becoming more mindful around these situations, you are practising a new skill. Everytime you surf the urge, you strengthen your ability to use this technique. Eventually, simply observing the urge without acting on it becomes second nature. It is possible to just let the urge just be. And once you master the art of urge surfing, you will feel a sense of relief and renewed self confidence, and you are on your way to being in charge of your eating. |
AuthorG'day. Welcome to my blog, where I write about mindful eating. My name is Sally Asher and I'm a wellness author of three books. I hold a Health Science degree and have a passion for behavioral change. I live between South Florida and Melbourne with my husband and two teenagers. My husband and I run a real estate investment company. I love to help people eat mindfully and reconnect with the innate, intuitive sense of eating that we are all born with. ArchivesCategories |